pathological lying - Psychologus

M Abdullah Qureshi

Lying is a very common behavior per se. There are various reasons one might choose to lie. Perhaps you do not want to cause trouble with your boss, so you might lie that there no problems at work. Perhaps a young adolescent might lie to his parents to cover up the fact that he was hanging out with his buddies.

Pathological lying is different. Pathological lying occurs even in situations where there is no harm in telling the truth.

I have talked in great detail how one could identify pathological lying behavior. To put it very shortly, pathological lying is the continuous behavior of lying irrespective of the consequences of a situation.

In this article, I will explain why pathological lying occurs in the first place.

Why would a person choose to lie even when there is no discernable gain?

I detail multiple reasons for this behavior. Let’s begin!

Shielding from Cognitive Dissonance

Well, consider something that you believed in since childhood. If that belief were to be violated by some new information, how would you feel?

Very anxious, fearful, depressed.

This is because of cognitive dissonance. Cognitive dissonance is the disruption of one’s thoughts when the belief that they held is successfully antagonized or challenged by a new belief or reality. The newer belief seems to be antithetical to the prior belief.

This is not exactly a comfortable situation. Here’s why.

To make room for the new belief, not only is the previous one challenged but many implications of the previous belief no longer seem to have a logical basis. So, there is intense tension of thoughts. It could be that you might not know what to do anymore. And if the belief was a core one, it becomes even harder to accept either of the beliefs.

Cognitive dissonance can be observed in people who, for example, get disfranchised with religion.

So, to stave off cognitive dissonance as much as they can, some people might lie to maintain a maladaptive belief. As this belief cannot stand the test of maturity, or is too painful to handle, a pathological liar will attempt to challenge the competing belief, even if it means foregoing logic.

Operant Conditioning

Operant conditioning is a mechanism of learning or adopting behaviors by actively influencing an environment. While there is surprisingly sparse research, there is some case-study based evidence that pathological lying can develop in children as the result of their behavior being reinforcing for them.

So, for example, an individual might find that simply denying any wrongdoing, no matter the magnitude, helps them get out of trouble. As a result, they can repeat this behavior in further circumstances.

This is an example of operant conditioning as the individual operates on the environment (by lying) and they receive negative reinforcement (possibility of their punishment decreases). As they have discovered their action to be reinforcing, the individual will practice this behavior again, as it could help them out of tricky situations in the future.

With this, I will now move on to reasons which might lead to pathological lying through indirect ways. Let’s explore further!

Cognitive Distortions

A maladaptive or irrational belief is not based on a logical and balanced assessment of reality. It could be formed by demandingness, as Albert Ellis would have put it. It could be formed by an antagonistic or traumatic event. Whatever the case may be, irrational beliefs are distorted versions of the perception of reality.

One class of agents which form such irrational beliefs is of cognitive distortions.

To define very simply, cognitive distortions are elements of subjective interpretations of reality which subjectively distort the content or information of one’s beliefs about the reality.

In the case of pathological lying, one could think along certain cognitive distortions. For example, an individual could view the other person as an enemy, engaging in dichotomous thinking (all or none thinking), even when they are relatively neutral in their stance towards the person. As a result, the individual, under the influence of dichotomous thinking – which is a cognitive distortion – could start fabricating information out of paranoia or dislike for the other individual.

Psychiatric Disorders

The psychiatric disorders which contribute the most to pathological lying are usually those that are associated with impulse control. These are usually substance use disorders, gambling disorder, or kleptomania. On the other hand, pathological lying can also be found in individuals with personality disorders – particularly Cluster B personality disorders.

If a person has an impulse control problem, they might try to lie in order to maintain their condition. For example, if one has a substance use disorder, they might lie to their physician about things which could lead to desirable outcomes. They could exaggerate their experience of pain to receive more painkillers. However, this can also fall under the ambit of malingering, which is a psychiatric diagnosis.

Another example could be of lying in personality disorders. An individual with narcissistic personality disorder might lie compulsively in situations where they wish to portray a grand image of themselves.

Much like cognitive distortions, psychiatric disorders might contribute indirectly to pathological lying.

Conclusion

Cognitive dissonance, conditioning, distortion and psychiatric issues, all are interconnected phenomena. All of these aspects can be seen contributing to the incidence of pathological behavior. This is no different in the case of pathological lying. If one follows the psychoanalytic perspective strictly, this behavior could originate from one’s childhood experiences which might be traumatic or disorienting.

Safe to say, pathological lying is not a fun condition. It can disrupt one’s life greatly, causing major problems at work, home, school or any other setting which involves communication. In fact, people who have this issue might find themselves being socially isolated from their protective circle. This, as mentioned earlier, could lead to an even more intensification of their compulsive lying behavior.

If you believe that you or someone you know might have a major issue with it, perhaps speaking to a mental health professional could be the best way to ease your discomfort.

In the current digital sphere, communication has diversified. No longer does one have to speak to each other directly. While this has greatly increased the convenience of communication, it has also increased the convenience for pathological lying.

Yes, this did just escalate quickly.

Pathological lying is a pattern of behavior of distorting or hiding information that is not really needed in the context. So, a pathological liar would be a person who lies ‘without much thought’, even in situations where he or she is not being harmed. One could connect pathological lying to psychopathy, Machiavellianism and/or narcissism.

However, compared to these large traits, pathological lying is one specific behavior. One study of 1,000 young offenders found excessive lying among 15% of males and 26% of females.

In this article, I will talk about 5 red flags that could give away someone who engages in pathological lying.

Let us begin!

1. Difficulty in Getting a Straightforward Answer

When one asks a simple question, a person who engages in pathological lying will respond with answers that are too vague. They might bring up some other topic or they might appear to connect the question to some other topic.

Not only that, you might feel as if you have to wrangle the answer out of them. This particle behavior is interesting because it directly relates to one aspect of a trait in the Five Factor Model of personality.

Straightforwardness is a major aspect of Agreeableness, a personality trait akin to being polite, honest and empathic. Psychopaths, narcissists and Machiavellians, all generally score less on measures of straightforwardness.

2. The Behavior is Persistent across Age and Context

Scientists have also defined pathological lying as chronic lying behavior. A pathological liar would seem to lie almost indiscriminately, across multiple situations. So, one major identifier here is if you hang out with this person and he/she continues to fabricate information even when there is no real need to.

I would further argue here that a person who has had a habit of lying pathologically can also remain functional. It could be that they have learned how to lie differently in different contexts to escape being caught.

However, there is a high chance that if you are their friend, relative, family or any kind of long-term associate, you will detect small indications of missing and distorted information.

This relates to the next point.

3. Suspicious Friends, Family and Colleagues

Even if the point being lied about is not important, when we learn that something someone says is untrue and dishonest, we might not trust them. This then forms the basis of the turbulent relationships that a pathological liar would have.

In the case of people who engage in pathological lying, the social circle they have might be suspicious of them. They might say that the person is insincere. Because of that, their family members or friends and colleagues might find it difficult to confide in them.

Often this distrust could show up in behaviors like not leaving any valuables in the pathological liar’s custody. It could also show up in not including them in close-knit family gatherings.

A crucial point to remember here is that this exclusion from social gatherings further solidifies pathological lying.

So, it is not at all an attractive thing to any person, even if they pathologically lie about many things. In fact, excluding such people from these gatherings could lead to even more personal isolation, which could increase their levels of paranoia.

4. Very Frequent Contradictions in Narratives

We as humans are far from perfect. We make many of the same errors in judgment that many people around us make.

However, with respect to the majority of people, the contradictions in our speech or expressions are far lesser and in-between than in the case of a pathological liar. It could be that when recalling a memorable trip, the individual could distort multiple points of the story to make them look superior. Conversely, if they are narrating a story or some point, they might distort parts of the story to put down someone else that they might not found favorable.

Whichever route they take, pathological lying can be identified when the story that they tell seems to be fundamentally distorted, with various points excluded from it.

One could say here that this is because pathological liars lack insight.

5. Confrontations Lead to Overreactions

No one really wants to be openly confronted about their lack of honesty. It makes us self-conscious about ourselves. However, we have enough wits about ourselves to realize genuine issues that we might have. When someone close to us tells us that we are being dishonest, we often make a goodwill attempt to understand what they mean.

Now, consider this in the context of an individual who does not realize that

they are being dishonest
being dishonest is a behavior that should be improved.

Such an individual would become defensive when they are confronted. Even in very private and personal settings. Since they do not consider you or anyone close to them trustworthy enough to tell the truth and be okay, they might see your or another friend’s advice as a challenge to their identity.

So, a pathological liar would view confrontations as open indication of antagonism.

And they would then reply according to this conception.

This could result in ‘fighting matches’ with their close associates. Further still, this could result in physical and violent confrontations.

Conclusion

While popular media portrays pathological liars as psychopaths with no distress, this is not the case. Pathological lying is one feature of many distressing psychological disorders. In fact, pathological lying is in itself considered to be a condition of its own, defined as pseudologia phantastica.

So, while pathological lying causes distress to others, it often originates from running from psychological distress in the individual. This makes it an uncomfortable condition for the person too.

If you feel as if you or someone around you has a behavior of lying pathologically, I would advise you to give this the proper time and care.

After all, wouldn’t it be great if we make our lives less distressing?